Terror In Mayberry
by hollywooddove
Summary: One day in Mayberry... a stranger arrives... a town goes into panic... Andy and Barney must go into action... things may never be the same in Mayberry.
1. Chapter 1

Terror In Mayberry

In Mayberry, perfect days are easy to come by. Rarely does anything more serious than a jay walker ever occur. Regardless, no one in the small town finds this boring - the regularity of the hum drum routine - and smiles can be found on most every face, except those who would not smile even if napping in paradise.

On this typically perfect day inside the hallowed walls of the Mayberry Courthouse, sheriff Andy Taylor and deputy Barney Fife were performing their daily duties: Andy typing at his desk and Barney sweeping out one of the vacant prison cells. Barney was whistling a pleasant tune while moving the settled dust out of the prison cell when he paused and asked, "Hey, Anj, when do you think Aunt Bee will be back?"

Andy said while looking at the typed page down his nose, "Hm, uh, tomorrow morning I think."

"I sure will be glad when she gets back; I haven't had a decent meal since she left."

Andy nodded, "Yeah, I shore will be glad when she gets back too. What have you been doing? Eating out?"

"No. That's too expensive. A buck eighty at five nights a week, well that's… let's see, drop the zero, carry a two, add six…"

"Nine dollars."

"What?"

Andy looked up at Barney with a matter-of-factly gaze, "A buck eighty at five nights, nine dollars."

"Yeah, of course. Well, anyway, I have been cooking my own food."

Andy smiled slyly, "I didn't know you could cook."

Barney smugly threw his chest out, "Are you kidding? Of course I can cook."

"Well, I'll be. The things you learn. What have you been cooking?"

Barney said, "Well, lot's of things."

"Oh yeah? Like what?"

"Oooh, you know. The usuals."

"The usuals? What's the usuals?"

Barney darted his eyes about and fanned an arm around with his words, "The usuals, you know, the usuals."

"No, I don't know. What kind of usuals, exactly?"

Barney cleared his throat and tugged at his tie and mumbled something.

"What was that?"

Barney mumbled again and placed a tight grip on his broom.

"I can't hear you Barn."

Barney suddenly shouted, "Beans! Alright, I have been eating beans every night."

Andy laughed a bit, "Beans? There's nothing wrong with beans. That's nothing to be embarrassed about."

"Who said I was embarrassed? I know there's nothing wrong with beans. I happen to make very good beans."

Andy giggled, "I bet you do."

"I do. And you can laugh all you want, but plenty of people like my cooking."

"I'm sure they do."

"They do. Plus, I have been spicing them up, adding my own unique flavors and personality to them."

"What kind of spices?"

"Chili sauce… mainly."

Andy laughed hard, "Chili sauce, I bet everyone gets a lot of your personality for sure."

Barney bent down to move the prison rug over a bit in a huffy motion, "You're just a regular jester, you are. Good thing you're in a court all day. We need to get you some bright pajamas and hat with jingle bells hanging all off of it…" During that spasm of anger when he moved the small rug, unnoticed by him yet certainly observed by Andy, a small card fell from Barney's shirt pocket to the floor.

"What's that is your pocket?" Andy asked.

Barney stood and trotted happily over to the desk, leaving the card on the floor, and reached in his pocket for another, brandishing it in front of Andy. "I have been meaning to show you these. Take a look at that."

Andy read it aloud, "Bernard Milton Fife."

Barney smiled brightly, "That's right."

"Well, that's just your name Barney."

"Yeah, yeah, but they were supposed to say 'Bernard Milton Fife: Deputy Sheriff' Louis down at the printers said he ran out of room to put Deputy Sheriff on there on account of how big I wanted the letters. Anyway, because of that, I got these cards printed at half cost."

"Let me get this straight. You don't have money to eat out in the afternoon, but you do have money to have a stack of cards…"

"Two hundred," Barney grinned and tapped the card in Andy's hand.

Andy cleared his throat and said, "A stack of two hundred cards with only your name on them?"

"Yeah, but they were supposed to say 'Bernard Milton Fife: Deputy Sheriff'"

"Uh huh. Why?"

"Why what?" asked Barney.

"Why do you need two hundred cards that say 'Bernard Fife…"

"Bernard Milton Fife," Barney raised a finger.

"… yeah, 'Deputy Sheriff'"

"Because, so I can hand them out to people when I protect and serve them."

Andy raised an eyebrow, "Why do you need to do that?"

"So they know who am I and what I am after the job is done."

"Barney, everyone in town knows who you are, and the badge tells them you are a Deputy Sheriff."

Barney insisted, "But don't you see Andy, this is the wave of the future. If people can't remember which Deputy served them, they have this card to go by."

"Barney, you are the only Deputy Sheriff in May…" Andy abruptly stopped and looked up in shock, holding his nose and fanning the air in front of him, "Barney, is that what I think it is?"

"Oh, I'm terribly sorry Andy. I told I have been eating nothing but beans every day. I think it's the chili sauce."

"Couldn't you hold it?"

"No, it hurts too much in my lower gullets."

Andy tried to remove his hand but the smell was too strong, "It smells like you might be dying."

"Well you don't have to hurt a guy's feelings."

The courthouse door busted open and old, stingy Ben Weaver busted in, "Sheriff! Sheriff! I need you out here at once."

Andy put his hand down and said, "Okay Ben, I could use some fresh air anyhow."

As the three of them walked out the door Ben wrinkled his nose, "Dead cat somewhere?"

"Dead gullet," said Andy.

Once outside Ben pointed out a fresh produce stand with a young man moving goods to a long line of ladies. "See, see there Andy. You have to go put a stop to it."

Andy said, "That looks like Fred Dingleberry's cart. I didn't know he was selling from his garden now. I don't know who that young man is."

"Andy, does Fred Dingleberry have a business license or a permit?"

"Not that I know of Ben."

"Well, why do I have to pay for a business license and Fred Dingleberry doesn't?"

Andy sighed, "He does have to have one, Ben. Just simmer down. I will take care of this."

"You just better Andy. Maybe we should get a Sheriff who stays on top of things in this town and enforces the rights of those of us who play by the rules."

Andy furrowed his brow, "Ben, now that's about enough. I said I'd take care of it. Now you go on about your business."

Ben wandered off growling under his breath.

Barney said, "That old Ben, has a hornet's nest in his bonnet all the time. What you gonna' do, have the boy move it off?"

Andy said, "The bigger question is, who is that young man, and why does he have Fred's cart?"

The young man was behind bars in Otis Campbell's usual cell as Andy reassured him, "Now, don't worry too much about this Mister David…"

The young man said, "Barnett. The name is David Barnett."

"Don't worry too much about this. You say Fred had to leave town to get a part for his plow and will be back day after tomorrow, and that you have been doing odd jobs at his home and selling from the cart is one of those jobs you were hired for."

"Hired is a bit of stretch Sheriff," said David, "I'm not actually receiving any cash from Mr. Dingleberry. He is giving me room and board plus meals while I am in town."

"And how long is that?" asked Andy.

"It's hard for me to say. I am really just passing through."

"You seem like a pleasant enough fellow Mr. Barnett. Why aren't you settled down with a nice job in some town?"

"It's a long story Sheriff, and rather personal. I hope you don't mind."

The Sheriff nodded, "Nope. Nope. I don't mind. And I hope you don't mind if I clear this whole story with Fred when he get's back. I have never known him to put on a hired hand. Not exactly Fred's way."

"I completely understand Sheriff. I would do the same. There are no hard feelings on my end."

Andy smiled, "Well, it's always nice to have cooperative guests." The phone rang and Andy answered it, "Hello. Hey Aunt Bee! You're home already? Well, that's great. And you couldn't be back a moment too soon. We have us a new patron here at Mayberry's finest, a young man by the name of David Barnett. Do you think you could rustle something up right fast and have Barney bring it over? Wonderful, wonderful. Thank you so much."

Later that afternoon Barney entered the courthouse with a large picnic basket in hand. He hustled from the door towards the room wherein was his cot, adjacent to the cells. The young man stood and said, "Deputy? Deputy? I found something that may belong to someone."

Busy and in thought, Barney asked, "What's that?"

David Barnett laughed a little, "Well, it's actually kind of funny. It's a card that reads 'Bernard Milton Fife,' and that's all it reads. Who would have a card with only their name on it? There is no title or any other information on it." He laughed a little harder, "Actually, it's more than a little funny, it's right down ridiculous. And that name, what a name. Only a person with a name like that could have a card like this made."

Barney shuffled to the prison cell and snatched the card, "Thanks," he said quickly and dryly. "I will make sure it get's filed accordingly."

David could sense a bit of frustration in Barney's voice, "Did I say anything wrong?"

"No, of course not."

"I'm sorry, I didn't catch your name Deputy."

Barney turned and began back to the room, "Barney, you can call me Barney."

David said, "Well, nice to meet you Barney…" then he thought for a second and whispered, "Barney. Bernard." David spoke loudly again, "Wait, Barney. I'm sorry if I made a mistake. That's not your…"

Barney finished, "Nope, not me. Not my card."

Barney went back to the room and looked into the basket. He moaned, "Fried chicken, mashed potatoes…" Barney opened a can of beans and poured them into a pan, then placed the pan onto a small electric hot plate. He stirred as he dumped heaps of chili sauce into the pan, "Let's see how you like my special spicy beans Mr. Smart Alec Barnett." Barney then took a bite of a chicken leg.

In the darkness of the early morning, closer to midnight than sunrise, the telephone in the little courthouse was consistently ringing. Out of the adjacent room, trudging heavy footed with drooping eyelids, Barney came dressed in his night gown and cap. He grabbed the phone and placed the wrong mechanism to his ear and spoke into the microphone which should have been listened to. "Hello. Barney's office, Deputy courthouse speaking."

He waited, shrugged, and placed the phone back on the hook. No sooner than he turned back to his sleeping chamber, the phone rang again. He picked it up in the wrong fashion again, his every motion latent with sleep, and said through blubbering lips, "Hello, Wally's station. Deputy…" and he began to snore. The phone fell from his hands and he started a bit, but not enough to open his eyes or hold his head up. A limp hand waved twice as he said, "Come again," and slumped back to his bed.

Barney never noticed the green glow emanating from the empty prison cell where the young and handsome David Barnett had been detained. Barney also did not see the gaping hole, almost large enough to pull an automobile through, in the rear wall of that prison cell. The hole was jagged, almost as if a bomb had went off in the cell. The sleeping Deputy was aware of none of this until the next morning light.


	2. Chapter 2

Terror In Mayberry: Chapter Two

Otis Campbell stumbled into the courthouse minutes before Sheriff Andy that morning. He walked as though he were on a small ship being tossed in a violent storm. He rocked and flailed about to his prison cell, which now had a back wall missing, and reached for the set of keys which normally hung on a hook between the two cells. The keys were not there. He said through drunken speech, "I tell you what. The level of service is just dropping in this place." Instead he reached in his jacket pocket and removed his own key, "Good thing Andy had my own key cut."

Otis unlocked the cell door, walked inside, and stammered directly back outside through the crumbled wall in the back of the cell. He turned left and walked out of sight.

Andy walked into the courthouse and was immediately alarmed by the hole in the wall. "Barney! Barn!" Andy raced to the small room where Barney slept, "Barney! Wake up." Andy shook Barney, who said in his sleep with a smile on his face, "Thelma…" and began to make kissing sounds. Andy shook him harder, "Barney, wake up!"

Barney sat up quickly, his night cap falling off, "Whu… what's wrong?"

"Barney, what happened? Are you all right?"

Barney said yes, "What's going on? What's the emergency?"

Andy asked, "What's the emergency? What happened here last night, Barn?"

"I don't know what you're talking about."

The two of them walked into the main chamber and Andy said, "Well?"

Barney still had not noticed the hole in the wall as Otis entered the courthouse again and made another circle out through the rear of the prison cell. Andy exclaimed, "The cell Barney! Look at the prison cell!"

Barney looked at the prison cell and leaped with excitement, "Andy! Well… wuh.. Wuh.. Andy! Andy! There's a hole in the wall!"

"I know that Barney, how did it get there?"

"I don't know Andy, I swear. I just don't know."

Otis made yet another circle through courthouse.

Andy asked, "Barney, how could you have slept through something like this?"

"I don't know Andy; I just don't know. Sometimes I sleep pretty hard."

Andy said, "Pretty hard? Barney, the back wall is blown open."

Otis walked back into the courthouse and to the prison cell and unlocked the door once again. Andy yelled, "Otis!" Otis stopped in his tracks and looked drunkenly at Andy. Andy said, "Otis, would you just stop."

Otis asked, "Stop what?"

Andy pointed at the busted wall in the prison. Otis reeled back a step and said, "Andy. The wall is gone."

Andy said, "Thank you, Otis. Use the other cell please."

"Oh, Andy, you know I don't like that other cell."

Barney said, "Otis, you get in that other cell. Your's is the scene of a crime now and we can't have you messing up the evidence."

"Andy?" Otis whined.

Andy said, "Barney's right Otis. You will have to use the other cell this morning."

Otis huffed and unlocked the other cell, "I said it once. The service in this place is going down hill by the second." Otis stepped inside and slammed the cell door, "You could at least call and warn a guy when you make renovations to his room," and Otis fell to the bed.

Andy reached for the phone on his desk and saw that it was turned over and off the hook. Barney was standing by the wrecked cell door and said, "Andy, did you see this?"

"See what?" Andy asked.

"There's puddles of… slime… or ooze, and it sort of looks like it's glowing."

Andy had the phone to his ear and said, "Don't touch it Barney." He focused his attention to the phone, "Hello, Sarah? This is Sheriff Taylor. Sarah, get me the State Office in Raleigh."

"The State Office?" Barney was shocked.

"That's right Barney. A blown out wall, a missing detainee, and green glowing slime, I think we may be a little out of our league here."

Barney shuddered at the thoughts of the mystery on hand, and he knew Andy was right. They would need help, very specialized help.

On the outskirts of Mayberry, highway 52 is the main travel way to arrive. A black sedan was bulleting towards Mayberry, swinging past slower vehicles and making an unknown record time. Behind the driver's wheel was a dark lens wearing man in a black suit. The passenger, an attractive strawberry haired woman was more than a bit nervous. "Mulder, do you think you might slow down a bit?" she asked.

Fox Mulder replied, "What's the matter Scully? Can't take life in the fast lane?"

She was white knuckled on her armrest, "There is no fast lane on this highway and you are going to get us killed."

"Yep. Well, I want to get into 'Poe Donk' and back out again as quickly as I can. I have no desire to linger in a one horse town."

Scully said, "I will be glad to just linger long enough to make it there. Besides, small towns aren't so bad."

"Are you kidding me? Everyone knows everyone else, sometimes almost intimately, and is nosing in everyone else's business. Filled with people of little ambition…"

Scully cackled, "Little ambition? That's a little unfair. How can you be so judgmental?"

"Come on Scully, if they had ambition they would not still be in the small town. Small ambition leads to poorly educated, which leads to this simple minded mass of back wood imbeciles who believe catching the largest fish is a milestone in a person's existence."

Scully was silent for only a moment, "Wow. You got some kind of chip there on your shoulder?"

"I am really surprised at you Scully. I always took you for a high rolling, ambitious city girl who grabbed life by the horns and tamed her own destiny. I never thought you would be the one to run to the defense of 'small town charm'."

Scully glared out the window and said softly, "Well, maybe I could use a little small town charm."

The black sedan came to a dusty halt in front of the Mayberry Courthouse. The two agents exited the car and Mulder knocked on the courthouse door. Barney opened and answered, "Can I help you?"

Mulder flashed his badge, "Hello, I'm special agent Mulder and this is special agent Scully of the F.B.I. It's been reported that you encountered a strange phenomenon leading to the disappearance of one person, damage to city property, and the findings of some sort of unknown residue left behind from the incident?"

Barney smiled wildly and grabbed Mulder's hand, shaking it rapidly, "The F.B.I.! Wow. A G-man, true an blue." Barney gave Mulder a slant eyed wink, "You know, I've often thought about signing up for the F.B.I. myself."

Mulder asked, "Is that right?"

"Oh sure. I try to stay apprised and up to current on the latest in detectiving."

"Really? What sources do you use?"

"Ah, you know," Barney was still gripping Mulder's hand, "'True Crime' magazine and all the latest 'Agent Thriller' paperbacks."

Mulder forced a smile and pried his hand from Barney's, "Well, it's hard to beat those."

There was an uncomfortable silence for Mulder as Barney stood and smiled, so Mulder nodded forward beyond Barney. "OH," Barney exclaimed and backed from the entrance, "come in. Come in. Make yourselves at home, you know, me casa you casa."

As Scully and Mulder stepped inside, Mulder looked back over his shoulder to Scully with a mocking smile. She cleared her throat to remind Mulder to watch his manners.

Andy stepped forward and put out his hand to Mulder, "Howdy there, I'm Sheriff Taylor, and I see you've met Deputy Fife."

Mulder kept his straight forward demeanor, "Agent Mulder and agent Scully."

Andy took Scully's hand gently and softly said, "Well. I declare. I never knew the F.B.I. enlisted such nice looking agents. Must be hard for a head turner like you to work undercover and not be noticed."

Scully blushed and looked away shyly, "Sheriff… nice to meet you."

Andy released her hand and stood admiring her while tried to hide her apparent reciprocation. Mulder was amazed that such a line could have such an effect on his partner. Through crooked mouth he said, "Yes… Sheriff Taylor do you think you could show us scene of the incident?"

Barney leaped in front of Mulder's face, "Come right this way agent Mulder. I'll show you the crime scene."

Andy never took his eyes off of Scully, and she did not follow Mulder.

Barney grasped his belt loops and tugged up his pants, arching his back and pursing his lips he said in a high nasally tone, "Here in the Mayberry maximum security facility, we have two of the most advanced holding cells known to forensic science." Barney patted the bars, "Yessiry, no one could bust out of this baby."

Mulder pointed to the hole in the back side of the cell, "Only if they decide to make their own back door."

Barney cleared his throat and said, "Yeah, well, sure," and he patted the bars again, "But you can take note the bars are still in tact. Just as strong as ever."

Mulder asked, "May I step inside?"

Barney unlocked the door and opened it, then gave the door a little tug, "See that. Space age steel."

Mulder stooped to the floor and scooped some of the glowing ooze into a sample tube. He stood back up and let the fluid prism in the sun, casting a green aura in the pupils of his eyes.

Barney asked, "What do you think it is?"

Mulder said, "Clearly, some sort of extra terrestrial secretion."

Scully heard this and stepped by Andy to the cell, "Based on what assumption?"

Mulder said, "I think it's pretty straight forward. This is the scene of an abduction."

Barney was bursting with curiosity, "What sort of an abduction?"

"This is a basic close encounter of the fourth kind, Deputy. What happens is an intelligence from space comes to Earth and takes a person aboard their vessel."

"What in the world for?" asked Barney.

"Popular consensus in the scientific community is the other world travelers are studying us."

"You don't say…"

Scully barked, "Here we go again. You think everything is an abduction or has some connection to sentient beings from outer space."

"What do you think happened?" asked Mulder.

Scully answered, "Without a serious investigation, less an immediate dose of wishful thinking, I'm sure it's difficult to know. But I would say this vagrant stranger passing through town may have had enemies or allies who decided to pull the wall down from the outside and… either free this prisoner or place him in an even worse type of captivity. Possibly to do him harm or even kill him."

Mulder flashed the vile of green ooze at her, "Then how do you explain this?"

"I don't at the present. I don't think we should make guesses with concrete evidence. The best course of action would be to let me take this sample and analyze it."

Mulder looked to Andy, "What do you think Sheriff?"

Andy smiled and gently scratched the back of his head, "Well… you two are the experts, and I don't mean to take any sides here, but you have to admit the sound of flying saucers and such is a bit far fetched."

Barney said, "Oh Andy, they're dropping out of the sky like flies all the time."

Mulder placed the sample of gook in Scully's hands, "Then I leave this in your charge. I eagerly await when you concede to my judgment of the incident."

Scully pierced Mulder with her eyes, "Not everything is an alien attack on humanity."

Mulder smiled, "And not everything isn't."

A growing ruckus of voices could be heard outside the courthouse. Andy opened the front door and saw a mass of upset towns people. Andy spoke over them, "Here now. What's this all about."

One of the local farmers stepped forward with a newspaper in his hand, "Andy, what are you going to do about this?"

Andy took the paper and read the headline, "Terror in Mayberry?" He continued to read, "Mayberry resident has made quite a claim… monstrous beast lurking in the night… turned his tractor over…" Andy looked into the crowd, "Who reported this?"

The local farmer said, "I heard rumor is was Luke Jenson. We all know Luke. Sober minded, serious, honest to a fault. He wouldn't make something like this up. What are you going to do to protect us?"

"First of all," Andy said, "Luke should have notified us instead of running to the newspaper first. Second of all, I will speak with Luke and get to the bottom of this. Until then, don't panic. As far as I know, no one has been injured or reported anything of the likes. Now you all just go home and go about a normal day."

Someone else from the crowd said, "We also heard the F.B.I. was here. Is that true? If there is nothing to worry about, what are they doing here?"

Mulder whispered in Scully's ear, "See, small town, news travels fast."

Andy said to the crowd, "Look, I'm in no position to give away any official details…"

Mulder stepped forward and addressed the group of people, "Folks, may I have your attention. My name Fox Mulder, I am a special agent with the F.B.I., and while it is true we are leading an investigation, we have no present evidence to alarm you of any creatures lurking about."

Someone shouted, "Then why are you here?"

"We are here to investigate a simple prison break."

A man in a brown suit made his way through the crowd to the front and faced Andy and Mulder, "I wouldn't be so quick to dismiss the claims made in this article."

Andy did not recognize the man in the suit, "I don't think I know you."

The man said, "No. We haven't met. My name is Jack McGee. I am a reporter with the 'National Register'." The man showed his reporter's license to the two officials. "I happen to believe the report made in your paper."

The crowd began to roar again and Andy addressed them, "Simmer down everyone. Simmer down. Now I want you all to go home while we get to the bottom of things here. I promise you all, we will let you know something as soon as we possibly can. Until then, go home and go about your normal day." Andy looked at the reporter and said quietly, "You mind not starting another riot?"

McGee replied, "Don't you think these people have a right to protect themselves?"

Andy asked, "Do you know something we don't know?"

"Maybe we should step inside and speak in private, Sheriff."

Andy nodded and led the way back indoors. Once everyone was inside, Jack McGee saw the prison cell with the busted wall and he smiled. "Looks like you might know something as well, Sheriff."

Andy asked, "What's that supposed to mean?"

"Look at that wall. What do you think did that? You think some normal man pushed that wall over?"

Andy said, "We are working on theories…"

"Theories," McGee laughed. "What sort of theories, Sheriff?"

Barney spoke up, "Aliens. This was the work of space aliens."

Andy reprimanded Barney, "Barney! You're not supposed to give away investigation details to a stranger."

McGee laughed again, "Don't worry, Sheriff. You're secret is safe with me. And as for that busted wall, I don't think little green men is what you have to worry about; it's one large green man you need to be concerned with."


	3. Chapter 3

Terror In Mayberry: Chapter Three

Mulder pushed his presence in Jack McGee's face, "I know your paper, 'The National Register.'"

McGee smiled, "Thanks for being a supporter."

"I find it to be a pile of garbage. Just an exploitive rumor mill."

McGee took a step back and spoke, "I have been tracking this creature for years, and I can guarantee you it is real, and there is a real possibility it is here amongst you now."

Scully inquired, "So you're saying we need to be out searching for a very large green man? I should think the phone would be ringing off the hook. A large green man would stick out like… well a large green sore thumb."

"No," McGee explained, "You should be looking for an average man. A wanderer passing through, someone willing to work for meager sustenance, like room and board. He will be a neatly dressed man, extremely well mannered, and highly educated."

Andy and Barney shared a suspicious glare.

"This man will seem very harmless," continued McGee, "but he is the monster. He has some sort of disease which enables him to transform into this hulking beast."

Mulder asked, "So, you're saying this man can change to a monster when he desires?"

"No, not when he desires. I don't think he has very much control over it at all. This is what makes him all the more dangerous."

Mulder scoffed, "This all sounds ridiculous, and I'm certainly not leading off this investigation on the word of some trash magazine reporter."

McGee smiled, "Have it your way agent. Look for your flying saucers as much as you wish. But when you find what I am telling you is true, you can find me at the Mayberry Inn." Jack McGee grabbed the door knob and prepared to exit the courthouse, "Good day, ladies and gentlemen."

After McGee had made leave, Mulder said, "Can you believe that guy?"

Scully said, "It does sound too incredible."

Andy said, "All of this is just overwhelming. I think Scully is probably correct. Someone pulled the wall down by the window bars and took our prisoner."

Mulder said, "Fair enough. Here is what we are going to do: Scully you get an analysis on that sample I took. Sheriff, I am going to need to interview this person of interest named Luke Jenson."

Barney quickly spoke up, "I can take him to Luke's place."

Andy said, "Sure thing Barney. That's a good idea." He then turned to Scully, "Agent Scully, ma'am, you can set your equipment up in this office. Anything we have here is yours to use, and I will help in any way I can."

Scully smiled, "Thank you, Sheriff. Are you sure I won't be in your way?"

Andy smiled, "I don't think it would be possible for you to be an unpleasant interruption for anyone. Besides, I could use the company."

Scully made a side blush again, and Mulder took careful note of it. He said to her, "I think setting up here would be fine if you can make sure you're not the one being distracted."

Scully said, "Don't be silly, Mulder."

Mulder only nodded and said, "Okay, then Deputy Fife. I'll follow you."

Barney smiled greatly, "Yeah, sure thing. Let's get a move on."

Scully had set her microscope and other equipment up on a table in Barney's annex sleeping chamber. She was wearing goggles and applying the sample to various chemicals. Andy stepped into the room and asked, "How's is coming?"

She sighed, "Not much to say right now. Some of these catalysts need some time to react with the sample before I can make any definitive report. Until then," she removed here goggles, "we wait."

Andy said, "I have a great idea; while we wait, why don't the two of us go across the street for an ice cream."

Scully laughed, "An ice cream?"

"Sure. It's a beautiful day outside, you could use a break. It will give you a chance to see a little of our quaint little town. You know what they say about all work and all no play."

Scully began removing her lab jacket, "It is true there's not much I can do here now. I suppose one ice cream can't hurt."

Andy smiled, "Now, that's the spirit."

Scully and Andy dined on their cones as they strolled up a sidewalk in the heart of Mayberry. Andy had been pointing out many of the businesses, what they specialized in and who owned them. Scully was quite impressed that the Sheriff knew so much about each and every business and the people who worked in them. He explained to her it was the most important part of his job to know the state of everyone who made Mayberry tick. He had made her aware of how important even the least of these individuals were to the welfare of the town; after all, without the people, left is but brick and glass.

Scully looked at her watch, "Maybe we should be heading back now. I think some of the tests will be ready."

Andy said, "Sure. How did you like the tour of our proud little Mayberry?"

She smiled, "It was very nice."

He said in a low keyed voice, "I thought you looked like you could use a little small town charm."

Scully tilted her head and looked him in they eyes, not shying away this time, "Yeah, I guess you're right."

Barney and Mulder were traveling down Tulip Road, on which Luke Jenson resided, and mostly the ride had been silent. Mulder surveyed the empty fields and pastures as well as the wooded forestry and sucked through his teeth with disdain. "When we get to Luke Jenson's," said Mulder, "let me run the interrogation. I only need you there in order to establish a trust between Mr. Jenson and myself."

Barney replied, "Good idea. I'll just stay in background."

"Fine," said Mulder.

"Like a watchful hawk guarding over it's nest of bounty."

Mulder rolled his eyes and slightly shook his head. Barney asked, "So, have you worked many of these invasion cases?"

Mulder said, "It's an abduction case. An invasion would be qualified by some sort of conquest. But the answer as you probably meant it is yes. I have worked many of these cases."

"Have you ever seen one?"

"An extra terrestrial being?"

"Yeah," said Barney, "Ever see one?"

"No." Mulder said quietly. "Not directly. Only the evidence they leave behind."

"I believe though," said Barney.

"Really? Why is that?"

Barney looked out the window from the passenger's seat of the black sedan, "Because, there just has to be more."

For the first time, Mulder found a hint of respect for Barney, and looked on him with approval, "Well said, Deputy Fife. Well said."

Luke Jenson was a large, brawny man who could have probably replaced two and one half of Barney. He told of what he experienced that night.

"I heard my dogs barking up a storm, and I know these don't bark unless it's something unusual. They are used to all the skunks and bobcats and such, and really pay them no never mind. The last time they barked close to this much was the time Earnest T. Bask had sneaked on my land and was thinking of robbing me of some chickens. So, I grabbed my shotgun, not really knowing what I might run into in the dark. Don't get me wrong, I don't want to shoot anyone, but I don't want to be hurt either. I ran Earnest T. off just by firing a couple of shots up in the air, and I reckon that would work with anyone."

"So I came out to the porch and I looked out and saw the biggest one man I have ever laid my eyes on. He was slowly making his way across the yard. I yelled, 'who goes there?' and he stopped and looked my way. I couldn't make any details out about him, only I could tell he was really really big, and covered with muscles. Not the kind of guy I would want to get in a scrap with."

"I yelled at him to get on and leave. But he only stood there. So I told Jasper, one of my dogs, to go run him off. Jasper ran up on the man, and the next thing I know, Jasper goes to flying through the air back at me. He had flung Jasper like he was a little stick or something. Jasper hit the ground and yelped, and then Japer ran off afraid. Well, that's my dog. I love my dogs. They the only family I got here. I pointed my shotgun up in the air and let her blow. That's when I head the thing growl at me. It was growling louder than a bear. That scared me, so I placed the gun on my shoulder and shot it. I know I shot it square, twelve gage buck, and it should have torn a big ole hole in him as close as we were together. I don't think it did much more than scratch the thing. I'm telling you, it wasn't no human. All I did was piss it off. It growled at me again and ran right up to me, grabbed my gun from me, and twisted the barrel up like a pretzel."

Mulder asked, "Can we see that gun."

"Sure." Luke walked down the hallway and soon came back with a shotgun twisted just as he had described it. He gave it over to Mulder for inspection. Luke continued his story, "I thought I was dead for sure. I just knowed this thing was going to pick me up and break me in half. But it didn't. It growled at me one more loud time and ran away. Headed right out through my dry pasture. My tractor was in it's way, and it didn't go around it. The thing pushed it over out of its way."

"Where would that be?" asked Mulder.

Luke pointed out over Mulder's shoulder, "Right out yonder."

Mulder and Barney turned and saw the tractor laying over on its side approximately one hundred yards away. Mulder asked, "Do you mind if we take a look at that before we leave?"

Luke said, "Be my guest."

"I know you said this man or thing was very large and very strong, but do you have any other descriptive details?"

Luke thought for a moment, "This is going to sound crazy, and you will think I am crazy if I tell you."

Mulder assured the farmer, "No one here is going to think that of you Mr. Jenson. You just need to tell me what you saw."

"Well, when I think back to it, I have to think I am crazy myself. It was dark you see. And when it was far away, I couldn't tell much about it at all excepting for its size. But when it was close to me, which weren't very long, and it was dark mind you, I could have sworn it had green skin."

Barney and Mulder looked at one another, recollecting what Jack McGee had told them earlier. Mulder said, "I just have one final question for you Mr. Jenson. And, when I ask this, you aren't in any trouble or anything, I am just curious. Why didn't you call the authorities concerning this? Why did you go to the newspaper first?"

"I did try. No one at the Sheriff's office would speak to me. Sounded like the phone picked up, but it was all garbled."

Mulder asked, "Have you ever heard of a man named Jack McGee?"

"Sure, I spoke to him that night," said Luke.

"Why would you call him? Why not your local paper."

"I did call the local paper. That was Mr. McGee's idea. You see, I read the 'National Register.' I've read it for a long time. I love those stories in there. When I saw what I saw, and I couldn't get the Sheriff's office, I had to tell someone who would believe me."

Mulder smiled, "I understand." Mulder closed his note pad and said, "I want to thank you for taking time with us Mr. Jenson. You have been a great help."

Barney and Mulder looked over the upended tractor and Barney asked, "So, what do you think?"

"If you are asking me if I think there is large humanoid monster shape shifting man rampaging around Mayberry, then no."

"No?" asked Barney in surprise. "But everything Luke said fits."

"It fits too well. Don't you think it's a coincidence that he called Jack McGee first, and not the Sheriff's office?"

"But he said he did call."

"Don't you watch the prison at night Mr. Fife?"

Barney nodded.

Mulder continued, "And did you hear the phone ring, or answer the phone any that night?"

"Not that I recall. But you have to remember, the wall of the cell was knocked down and I didn't hear anything either."

"Mr. Fife, have you been experiencing any headaches, or ringing in your ears?"

"Well, sometimes."

"In many of these abductions, the aliens will wipe away any memories of the experience from any witnesses."

Barney was shocked, "You don't say?"

"It's pretty standard abduction procedure," said Mulder.

"You mean I have had my brains erased?" asked Barney clutching his head.

"It would explain a lot," said Mulder. "I mean a whole lot." Mulder took a deep breath, "What we have are two different incidents, Deputy. One real, and one a fraud. The man in your cell was abducted by aliens, and the large green man is a story cooked up by Jack McGee to sell papers."

"Both happening on the same night?" asked Barney.

"When it rains, Mr. Fife, it pours."

"So what's next?"

"We need to get back on the original case and ignore these big green giant leads. Do you have any other information on this man who was in your holding cell, like where he might have been staying?"

Barney snapped his fingers, "The Dingleberry farm."

Mulder said, "Can you take us there?"

Barney said, "Let's go."

Shortly before Barney and Mulder had wrapped up their investigation with Luke Jenson, Dana Scully was completing her analysis of the bizarre substance which had been found on the floor of the prison cell. Her mouth dropped open a bit and she ran her fingers into her hairline, "You have to be kidding," she whispered. She was in a state of amazement with her findings. "Sheriff Taylor," she called. "Could you come back here?"

Andy was soon beside her, "Yes ma'am, what can I do for you?"

She looked back and smiled for a moment only, and then she said in all seriousness, "You aren't going to believe what the green goop is."

Andy nodded, "Probably not. What is it."

"Feces. And that's not the incredible part."

"What's the incredible part?" Andy had placed his hand on her shoulder and was almost breathing the words in her ear.

"It's human feces. This came from a human. There are high levels of adrenalin, and I do mean very high levels, binding to the used hemoglobin cells in the feces. As a matter of fact, the levels are so high, I don't see how the person could live without their heart possibly exploding."

"Mhm. So, why does it glow?"

"The adrenalin is bound to the hemoglobin in a way I have never seen before. It's an anomaly I have never seen in any medical journal. For some reason, this unique binding is also giving away another type of energy, and the emitted photons are causing the glow."

Andy massaged her shoulder a bit, "Fascinating. Absolutely fascinating. You sure are packing a wallop of smart brains in that pretty head of yours."

Scully tried to hide her wide grin caused by the compliment. She turned to the Sheriff, and their faces were very close. "Sheriff, do you know where this prisoner would have gone if he had escaped with no help from anyone else?"

"You don't think he busted through that wall on his own, do you? He was not a very big guy."

"Extremely high levels of adrenalin have been known to cause sometimes super human strength in subjects."

Andy was gazing softly in her eyes, and both had began to speak in a most trans like humming, "What else does high levels of adrenalin cause?"

"Excitement. Base instinctual behaviors."

"I don't know where he would have went, but I do know where he was staying."

Scully's head tilted back a bit, "I don't think a man on the run would return to a place where the authorities could find him, do you?"

"No," said Sheriff Taylor. "But there could be some leads there. The owner of the place is out of town, so if he were there, he would be alone."

"Alone?" Scully said as their lips were very close.


	4. Chapter 4

Terror In Mayberry: Chapter Four

Fred Dingleberry's homestead sat on a farm estate of one hundred and twelve acres which was located on the very edge of Mayberry. Every aspect of the abode was manicured to perfection; Norman Rockwell could not have painted a more perfect scene. The ranch style farm house was whitewashed, and there was large red barn behind it in perhaps three minutes walking. Barney and Mulder had just arrived in the black sedan, and parked beside the Mayberry police cruiser which was already there.

Barney exited the sedan and looked inside the window of the police car, "Andy must already be here somewhere. He's not inside the car."

Mulder nodded, "Seems the Sheriff was coming to the same conclusion we did."

"You don't think the abducted man is here, do you?"

Mulder answered, "Not likely, but possible. Sometimes, when the aliens are finished experimenting, they will return the victim to a place they are familiar with."

"Will his brain be erased like mine?" asked Barney.

"If he is here, chances are he will be missing time. It's very common."

Barney looked around, "Where do you think we should start?"

Mulder pointed to the red barn, "I think that would be good place to begin."

Mulder slowly placed his hand on the rope which would pull open one of the large barn doors, "You ready?" he asked Barney, who tilted his forward in affirmation. Mulder pulled the door open and light poured into the barn. There was movement inside. Mulder pulled his firearm and aimed towards the shadowy mass inside the barn.

Andy's head was buried in Scully's neck when the light from the barn door blinded him. He jerked his head around, his face tattooed on the cheek and the upper lip with red lipstick smears. He saw Mulder had a gun pulled on him and Scully. Andy instantly released Scully and raised his arms, "Wait, it's us. It's us."

Scully straightened the neckline of her blouse and was red with embarrassment. "Know how to knock maybe?" she mumbled.

Barney grinned from ear to ear, "Alright Andy."

Mulder lowered his firearm and said, "What part of your investigation is this, Sheriff Taylor?"

Scully said, "Oh, put a sock in it Mulder."

Mulder and Barney walked into the barn. Mulder began to look into the stalls one by one. "Regardless," he said, "there could be some evidence from our mystery man here."

Andy said, "That's just what we were thinking. That's why we're here."

Barney nudged Andy on the arm and said, "You old dog."

Mulder stopped at one of the stalls and said, "I'd say the evidence in this stall reveals a lot."

Everyone gathered by the open stall and looked inside. Laying on the hay, sound asleep, was David Barnett. He was missing shirt and shoes, and his pants were split from the ankles to the knees.

Mulder pointed out to Barney, "It's not uncommon to find the aliens have dropped the victim off in place familiar to them. As you can see, it's evident they removed his clothes forcibly while performing their tests."

Barney asked, "Why would they tear his pants like that?"

"Some of their techniques have been documented to be… well let's just say, quite invasive."

Scully sighed, "Just because a man has torn clothing does not mean he has been abducted by aliens."

Mulder retorted, "What's your theory agent Scully?"

Scully stepped inside the stall and said, "Why don't we just wake him and ask." She bent down and gently nudged the sleeping man, "Mr. Barnett? Mr. Barnett, are you alright?"

David Barnett awoke and withdrew in fear, cringing against the wall. Scully said, "Don't be afraid Mr. Barnett. My name is Dana Barnett, I am a special agent with the Federal Bureau of Investigation. Behind me is my partner Fox Mulder and the local police. Are you well enough to stand and answer some questions for us?"

David nodded and slowly rose to his feet. Mulder asked him, "Mr. Barnett, do you have any recollection of how tall the aliens who abducted you are?"

David looked bewildered, "What is he talking about?"

Scully said, "Please don't answer that question, Mr. Barnett. Do you recall being incarcerated by Sheriff Taylor in the Mayberry Courthouse?"

"Yes," said David. "The Sheriff was holding me there temporarily, not so much as a prisoner, but until he could validate the story that I was staying with Fred Dingleberry and doing odd jobs for room and board." David stepped out of the stall and into the main barn area, "The Sheriff and Deputy had been very nice to me, and I didn't mind. I understood their reasoning."

Scully asked, "Do you have any idea how you escaped from the prison and made it here?"

"No, I don't remember that."

Barney said, "They got his brain too."

There was the click of a rifle being cocked into firing position and everyone turned to find Jack McGee standing in the doorway of the barn. He was holding a rifle aimed directly for David Barnett. Mulder, Scully, and Barney drew their weapons and placed aim on McGee. Mulder ordered, "Mr. McGee, place the firearm on the ground and put your hands in the air."

McGee said, "Why don't you tell them your real name, Doctor David Banner? Tell them how you change from a normal man into a hulking green behemoth which possesses super human strength?"

David backed a step, "You keep that man away from me."

"Come on, Doctor Banner," said McGee. "For once, wouldn't you like to come clean? Don't you want some real help? These people are from the F.B.I., they could place you in the hands of doctors who could help you find a cure for your disease."

"I don't know what you're talking about," said David.

Mulder said, "Drop that rifle Mr. McGee."

"This rifle contains tranquilizer darts. Each dart has enough medication in it to drop an African bull elephant. If Doctor Banner over there decides to turn into our big green friend, you're going to be glad I was holding this gun agent Mulder."

Scully looked back at David, "He's telling the truth about one thing Mr. Barnett. If you are sick, I will make sure you get the very best doctors to help you. You don't need to be afraid."

David scoffed, "So what? I can be prodded and tested? So the government can try to duplicate what I did and make a weapon from it? I can't allow that."

Scully said, "I know the name Dr. David Banner. I remember when he went missing, presumed dead. Is it true, are you David Banner?"

David knew he was defeated, and he said, "Yes. I am Doctor David Banner."

McGee shouldered the rifle tighter, "I told you. Don't trust him, agent Scully. If he turns into the Hulk, then he could easily hurt or kill all of us."

Scully said to David, "You don't want to hurt anyone here, do you?"

David said, "No. I don't want to hurt anyone."

McGee said, "You should all get a safe distance from him. You think you can trust a man who has been keeping a secret like this for years?"

David said, "You need to make him stop; he is making me nervous."

Mulder said, "I have to insist you place that weapon down Mr. McGee." Mulder cocked his gun, "This is your last warning or I will fire."

McGee laid the rifle on the ground and kicked it to the side, "That was a huge mistake."

Andy placed cuffs on Jack McGee and began to recite his rights. Everyone placed their weapons back in their holsters. Scully asked David, "Is it true? Can you transform into a monster that would hurt us all?"

David said, "It doesn't quite work like that. I can't change on my own will. I have to be under extreme stress, anger or fear."

"So what triggered your prison break? Was it anger or fear?"

David said, "Chili sauce."

Scully was completely bewildered.

David pointed to Barney, "That man right there did it to me." Barney jumped in surprise, and David recollected the events of that night. "The Deputy brought me a plate of the of the spiciest beans I have ever eaten, and I wouldn't have eaten them if I had not been so hungry. After I ate them, I had cramps in my lower intestine unlike I have ever had in my life. The urge to defecate was so powerful I knew I wasn't going to be able to hold it in. I called and called for the Deputy to wake up and let me go use the facilities. He never answered. I remember falling to the floor, balled up in a fetal position, crying for dear mercy. I have never felt such pain associated with this bodily function. I was trapped between the pain of the cramping and the tension of trying to hold it in. I remember hearing a sound… something like a boat propeller hitting a log… I think it came from me… and then I woke up here with agent Scully nudging me."

Scully said, "That would explain the feces."

Barney said, "If you didn't like the beans; you didn't have to eat them."

Andy said, "Don't let your feelings get hurt Barn."

Barney said, "Oh, what do you know."

Mulder said, "I still don't believe any of it."

Scully said, "Because it doesn't involve flying saucers?"

Mulder replied, "Blow it out your butt, with your school girl infatuation on the first goofy hick you see."

Scully's mouth dropped open in dismay and Andy said, "There's no need to get all nasty there friend."

Mulder said, "I'm not you're friend, Sheriff. And I'm not you're friend Deputy, or yours Mr. McGee, and I thought I was your friend Scully, but obviously not." Mulder said to David, "If you were really changing to some creature which could knock down walls, it would be in the news," and Mulder looked back at McGee, "the real news."

Scully said, "Mulder, don't you think this is enough?"

Mulder suddenly pulled his gun again and aimed it point blank at David Banner, who threw his hands up and exclaimed. The entire barn of people were taken aback a the action, and began to implore Mulder to put the gun away. Mulder said, "Let's see it then, Dr. Banner or Mr. Barton, or whoever you really are."

David had begun to sweat a bit, "Please, put the gun away?"

"What's the matter? Feeling a bit panicked? Your heart racing? Mind becoming foggy? Breathing heavily?"

McGee yelled, "For goodness sakes! Someone stop him before he unleashes the Hulk."

Scully begged, "Mulder, we all know you aren't going to shoot an unarmed man. Please put the gun away before an accident happens."

Barney pulled his revolver and placed aim on Mulder, "Put that firearm away agent Mulder."

Mulder laughed, "You suddenly grow a backbone Deputy? You think you have what it takes to shoot a man?"

David was sweating profusely, "Can't we all just take this down a notch or two?"

Barney's hands were shaking as he held the revolver on Mulder. Andy said, "Barney. Lower your gun."

"Can't do that," Barney's voice cracked. "There's right and wrong, and this man is in the wrong."

Scully said to Barney, "The Sheriff's right, you don't look so steady. If you accidentally pull the trigger you could do something you would regret."

McGee said, "You should both put your guns away before you cause Dr. Banner to loose it."

David screamed at McGee, "This is all your fault! If you would just stay away, this would have never escalated to this point."

McGee laughed, "That's it. Show them."

Scully knew Barney was dangerously close to trembling the trigger of his gun and putting a new orifice in Mulder's head. If she could quickly grab his wrist and pull to the left, the gun would fire in a harmless trajectory into the barn wall. She was close, very close. She needed a distraction. She eyed Andy, who could now perceive her plan.

Andy stepped closer to Barney and said, "You're right Barney. You keep that gun on him."

Barney smiled and shuffled in excitement, "You're darn tootin' I'm right. I got him straight in my sights, you don't have to worry about a th…"

It happened, Scully reached and grabbed Barney's wrist and pulled. Just as she had expected, he pulled jerked the trigger and the hammer sprang against the revolver. The gun made a click, and this was all. Consequently, Mulder flinched, and in doing so dropped his guard long enough for Andy to snatch his pistol away. This all happened in a mere moment of time. David drew a long breath of relief.

Mulder sternly stated, "Sheriff, do you know you have just disarmed a federal agent. You won't be able to hide behind your badge for that."

Andy said, "I have plenty of witnesses here who back on me the necessity."

Scully was breathing heavily, "You mean to tell me you carry around an empty gun?" she asked of Barney is disbelief.

Barney said, "No. Of course not. I have a bullet in there."

"A - bullet?"

"I keep it all shiny too. I could have sworn I had it loaded." Barney pointed the gun towards the wall of the barn and pulled the trigger again. No one had prepared themselves for the explosive bang of the shell when the gun actually fired this time. There was total trepidation shared by the each person including Barney. The worst of it wasn't over.

The bullet ricochet off an anvil setting next to the wall and changed trajectory, vectoring toward the sky, tearing the corner from a board which held bails of hay in the loft. The board popped loose and a square bail tumbled out of the loft falling directly on Mulder's head, knocking him unconscious. The bullet ricocheted once more, sailing back and nicking David Banner across the back of his shoulder and neck. David yelped in pain and clasped the back of his neck. He fell to one knee, his eyelids squeezed, his other hand balled in a fist.

Jack McGee smiled, "Here we go."

David opened his eyes and stared into Scully's. The iris of each eye had turned a brilliant shade of green, glowing and pulsating. Scully took one step back, "Dr. Banner?" David began to heave, each heavy breath pushing his chest out farther and farther. He groaned as his skin stretched from his muscles inflating like balloons. The pitch of his moans grew deeper and deeper as his skin and hair shifted to a dark green hue. He threw his head back and growled, sending terror down the spines of the barn's inhabitants.

The Hulk slowly rose to his feet as Scully stepped back. Andy had darted behind her, cowering, using her body as a shield. She felt him behind her and said, "Really?"

Jack McGee said, "I told you. I told you." The Hulk roared at McGee, who jumped backward and fell to the ground. He struggled to sit back up with his hands cuffed behind his back. "Okay, okay."

Scully said, "David, can you hear me in there?"

The Hulk roared again, his shoulders flexing. Andy cowered down even more. He said, "This can't be real, this can't happen in Mayberry."

The Hulk looked down and saw Mulder laying. His primitive mind seemed to recall the foggy vision of this man holding a gun in his face. The Hulk lightly thumped Mulder with his foot and thundered a cry of rage down on him. He reached down with every intention of flinging the limp agent against the wall.

"Hold it right there," Barney commanded. The Hulk looked into Barney's eyes and snarled. Barney gulped and took a cautious step towards the Hulk. "Hold on, big fellow. Now just hold on." A guttural reverberation rolled out of the beast's lips. "I know…" Barney said, taking another gentle step forward and speaking oh so softly, "I know how you feel. I know how it feels to blow your top over something when things don't go your way."

The Hulk made a threatening furrow with his brow as Barney stepped once more. "We all do it. All of us. Life doesn't go perfectly for any of us. I know that for sure. Mine never has." The green muscles tightened and the green hands made fists.

Scully said, "Be careful Deputy Fife."

"Life can be difficult, right?" asked Barney, and the Hulk made a moan which sounded as though he confirmed what Barney had said. "I mean, look at me. I will never be Sheriff, no matter how much I would like to be. And that's frustrating." The Hulk softened his brow and loosened his fists, the groans now sounding more like purrs. "And you, I mean look at you. People always wanting to wave guns around at you. I bet you get that a lot." The Hulk nodded slowly. "And you have that Frankenstein shade of skin," and the Hulk frowned again and bellowed in anger. Barney trembled at the roar and said quickly, "Which is just a delight to look at. You know, green's my favorite color. I don't know anyone who doesn't love green, right Andy?"

Andy said, "Yeah boy, I like me some green."

"The point is, I know what it feels like be alone and misunderstood. We all do sometimes." Barney was toe to toe with the Hulk now, and he reached out and laid a gentle hand on the monstrous giant's chest. "You're not alone, big fellow. You're not alone."

The Hulk was soothed, and his face was gentle. He smiled at Barney and tried to speak, but only pleasant growls came out. Scully whispered, "That was amazing."

Barney shared the pleasant moment with the Hulk and slowly reached in his shirt pocket. Barney removed one of the cards embossed with 'Bernard Milton Fife' and placed it in the Hulk's might hand. "Take this. There's always a friend on that card."

The Hulk looked at the card and smiled brightly. Barney said, "Now, you go on and get out of here. Go somewhere you can start over again. I wish you the best of luck."

The Hulk turned and raised his fists, ready to smash the barn wall down and make leave. Barney touched his shoulder blade and said, "No, no buddy." The Hulk looked back at Barney who told him, "Use the door." Barney pointed at the open barn door. "It would just be… you know… easier on everyone."

The Hulk walked by Barney and Scully, stepping over Mulder in the process, Andy revolving around Scully to keep her between the Hulk and himself. McGee kept his eyes on the Hulk from where he sat as it approached. The giant flinched, making claw like hands and leaning over McGee. Jack McGee pushed back with his feet and rolled into a ball, whimpering in a high voice, "Okay, okay." The green creature chuckled a bit.

Before exiting, the transformed persona of Doctor David Banner looked down on the card in his hand once more, and then looked back on the people in the barn and smiled. He turned and walked out. Barney waved and said, "Goodbye, big fellow."

Dana Scully wiped Andy Taylor from her back and ran to Barney, grabbing him and firmly kissing him on the lips. "Done like a real man," she said. Barney smiled and kissed her back.

Groggily, Mulder sat up and looked around, "Where is David Banner?"

Scully said, "We let him go. There was no further reason to detain him."

Andy was heading out the door when Mulder called after him, "Is that true Sheriff? Did you let the key witness go?" Andy just kept walking. Mulder yelled, "Where are you going?"

Andy answered, "There's nothing here to interest me any longer."

Jack McGee cackled, "You missed it agent Mulder. The Hulk did show up."

Mulder looked at Scully, "Scully, is that true?"

She smiled at Barney and gave him a peck on the cheek, "I didn't see a thing? How about you Barney?"

Barney said, "Just an innocent man who needed to get on with his life."

Her smile broadened and she locked lips with Barney again.

Mulder rose to his feet, "I knew the whole story was a load of crock." Mulder dusted himself off and left the barn.

Scully said to Barney, "Deputy Fife, how would you like to treat me to a little small town charm?"

Barney said, "Oh, I got you're charm for ya'"

The two of them walked out hand in hand.

Jack McGee suddenly realized he was alone and still cuffed. He said, "Hey, hey. Somebody? Somebody come get these cuffs off of me." His pitch rose until he was screaming, "Heeeey! Somebody get these off me." McGee began to kick his feet and struggled to stand, instead he fell over on his face. He snorted dust and said, "Okay, okay."

A long brown automobile was heading into Mayberry, and the driver was wearing a straw hat with a burgundy and black band around it. He was humming and speaking into a microphone attached to a tape recorder in the seat by him. "And it occurred to me then, that what these people were seeing was…"

The Hulk met the car on his walk out of Mayberry. Carl Kolchak stomped on the breaks and peered out the window, only to see the Hulk squat and jump over the tree line, vanishing. Kolchak slumped back in his seat and blew out a breath. He returned the microphone to his mouth, "Looks like I'm too late for this one."

High over the trees of the road leading into Mayberry, the voice of Rod Serling drifted into the breeze. "I have no idea what just happened here."


End file.
